My name is Gracie.
I’m new here.
Hell, I’m new anywhere. I think I’m ten weeks old.
This is a picture of me and what they call a football.
I’m a dog.
I have no idea what that means except the creatures I’m with keep referring to me as a “puppy.”
When they’re not referring to me as Satan.
I think puppy is a kind of dog.
I’m not sure whether it means I’m a small dog, a kind of dog, or what.
Something happened. (I’ll get to all the boring stuff about being born and all that crap later.)
No, something happened that apparently isn’t normal.
I can think and write. Apparently other dogs can’t do this.
I can’t talk, except dog, but none of these creatures I’m with speak dog.
I got to this place two weeks ago, and two creatures live here. They call themselves “people.”
I have no idea what that means either. They don’t speak dog.
What they do speak is gibberish, a lot of it, and most of it in a high–pitched tone.
Well, not THAT high-pitched. I mean I can hear stuff a lot higher pitched than the sounds they make…but still.
One of them has a deeper voice than the other.
It’s not perfect. Like I said, I can’t talk and I get distracted REALLY EASILY so some of this might not make as much sense as I think it does.
I’ll try to find out what happened to me because it might come in useful later, you know, in people/dog relationships.
I hear there’s a lot of confusion.
There sure as hell is around here.
The creature with the deeper voice has this machine that I’m using and it does stuff–it writes, remembers and tells stuff.
So when he’s not here, (which, frankly, is not a hell of a lot of the time; I don’t get many chances)) I’ve decided to use the machine.
I’ve got paws and I can those little black and white things.
They turn into words.
You probably can’t write back to me.
I’d like that though. I’m trying to get a handle on this people/dog thing and I’m not sure these creatures I’m with are going to be all that much help.
The creature with the most hair on its head is apparently my manager.
The chief boss is the creature with the deeper voice. He doesn’t spend as much time with me and when he does he makes a lot of bossy remarks, more than the other one, who might be a push-over.
But I don’t know. She called me Satan the other day. She’s getting bossy too.
She might surprise me.
Anyway, got to go, not from here, necessarily, I have to pee. (Have to ring a stupid bell to get out the big glass door.)
I’ll try to provide some pictures of me, if I can figure out how to add them to these messages. I mean I can write and stuff but some technical things might be beyond me.
I’m a friggin’ dog after all.
Wait…I figured it out~I put that picture in up there
MY name is Gracie.
The one with the deep voice calls me GRRRacie.
I think that’s meaningful, or funny or something.